Agent Nora and the Troll

Mrs Figg wrote:  sorry short attention span.

 you will be re-promoted asap.  

 

 

Norc wrote:topicality?

I mean that the stories often reflect whatever current forum drama has gotten everyone's attention. It's fun to see stuff reflected back through the mirror of fiction so quickly.

 ''remember my first week?'' he said, ''locked me in a broom closet with Orwell for 5 hours'' he shuddered then giggled, went a deep red colour, and then jingled his coins in a manly way. ''made a man out of me it did''

I have two questions:

(1) Which Orwell McOdo was it? (there's a few!) {{{ }}}

and:

(2) What was Blue before he became a Man?

it was Lance in the broom closet, and before that experience he would talk to his Hamster and call him Mr.Fluffykins, afterwards he avoided eye contact with poor little Fluffykins.

Eldorion wrote:

Norc wrote:topicality?

I mean that the stories often reflect whatever current forum drama has gotten everyone's attention.  It's fun to see stuff reflected back through the mirror of fiction so quickly.

oh.

Mrs Figg wrote:it was Lance in the broom closet, and before that experience he would talk to his Hamster and call him Mr.Fluffykins, afterwards he avoided eye contact with poor little Fluffykins.

''Right!'', said Nora, ''gather round and listen up, we need a plan of action, has any of you lot got any bright ideas?''
''oh I am sure they are full of them, the little darlings'' said a soft creepy voice behind them. Agent Nora jumped. It was Matron Figg.
Even hardened DI's like Petty were scared of the Matron, she forced them to swallow her vile eel oil syrup, and tried to rub lard on their chests when it got below 30 degrees in the Winter. She was a tyrannical health freak, even wild wolves slunk off when she approached, they hated having their paws wrapped in the pink woollen mittens she knitted for them.
She ruffled Blue's hair, and gave Bungo a wink, Bungo backed off and hid behind Nora.
Agent Nora frowned as the Matron circled the bunch of trembling newbies, like some velvet skirted vulture ready to pounce on the weak and wounded.
Nora coughed and said in a louder voice, trying to keep their eyes from following the Matron. ''you know I am an expert Troll hunter?, ''my advice is to toddle on over to Elthir's cottage, the Loremaster Always has some sound advice, if a little cryptic''.
''ooooooo can I come with? said Halfy who had just walked in. Halfy was on the forensics team and always ready to bunk off work to do something exciting.
'oh ok then'' said Nora grumpily.

Agent Bungo put his hand up.
''yes Bungo'', said Nora.
''We have to think, what would Walter White do in this situation, I mean extreme violence does have its merits you know''. said Bungo with enthusiasm.
''erm thanks Bungo, but I am not clear to what depths Mr White goes to, as I only caught the first episode'' said Nora.
''oh he goes aaaaaaaall the way and over that hill'', said PC Blue.
''yeah we need Semtex'' said PC Malick nodding in agreement.
''We are NOT blowing up the Troll'' said Nora, ''that shit will cover Svalfart in a foot deep crust, we need a bit of subtlety'', she said.
Bungo rolled his eyes.

We're going to need some fulminated mercury!  

Mrs Figg wrote:  sorry short attention span.

 you will be re-promoted asap.  

Ha! I get it now!  

Mrs Figg wrote:''Right!'', said Nora, ''gather round and listen up, we need a plan of action, has any of you lot got any bright ideas?''
''oh I am sure they are full of them, the little darlings'' said a soft creepy voice behind them. Agent Nora jumped. It was Matron Figg.
Even hardened DI's like Petty were scared of the Matron, she forced them to swallow her vile eel oil syrup, and tried to rub lard on their chests when it got below 30 degrees in the Winter. She was a tyrannical health freak, even wild wolves slunk off when she approached, they hated having their paws wrapped in the pink woollen mittens she knitted for them.
She ruffled Blue's hair, and gave Bungo a wink, Bungo backed off and hid behind Nora.
Agent Nora frowned as the Matron circled the bunch of trembling newbies, like some velvet skirted vulture ready to pounce on the weak and wounded.
Nora coughed and said in a louder voice, trying to keep their eyes from following the Matron. ''you know I am an expert Troll hunter?, ''my advice is to toddle on over to Elthir's cottage, the Loremaster Always has some sound advice, if a little cryptic''.
''ooooooo can I come with? said Halfy who had just walked in. Halfy was on the forensics team and always ready to bunk off work to do something exciting.
'oh ok then'' said Nora grumpily.

I was going through to find the choicest bits and highlight them for special attention - but the whole damn steak is tender and delicious, Mrs Figg!  

bungobaggins wrote:We're going to need some fulminated mercury!  

Are you sure that the subtler way is not better? I hear trolls are fond of rice and beans.

 

Eldorion wrote:

bungobaggins wrote:We're going to need some fulminated mercury!  

Are you sure that the subtler way is not better?  I hear trolls are fond of rice and beans.

giants are fond of beans. trolls like porridge. and princesses. and gold. and ... they hate christian men...

Norc wrote:... they hate christian men...

Don't we all?