2014 Forumshire Film Awards!

Good to see the film awards getting off to a good start. I won't be around until tomorrow evening. Looking forward to seeing all the results.

HUAN STOP BARKING UP THAT TREE AT PETTY! When he needs to be barked at I'll tell you!

Now we have our next award, which technically probably could have been absorbed into "Worst Action Set Piece" but considering that would bloat the category this one was created!


This category had several dumb moments that it was hard to just pick one (in fact a couple voted for all of them) so here we have a tie! Normally I'd implement my monarchial authority and pick a winner, but I thought each of them was equally stupid, so there are two winners:

KILLIEL

uGH.

My apologies, I just threw up looking at those gifs...
Both of these subplots were added to DOS in order to extend and heighten the drama in the stretched out story. What it did instead was leave us with an underdeveloped love story that had no purpose and a character who the Coven loved so much they forgot the actual characters from the book were more important.

Next award, Beren will give it a go!

Worthy winners (mind you all the nominations were in this category )

Hello Forumshites! It's been too long since I've been to your lovely little village here {{{{{And I could have waited longer still}}}}}}}}}}}}}} But since I have to watch Tin's alcohol consumption, and considering that this is an awards show and alcohol is EVERYWHERE, it is my duty to supervise her... and I guess help out presenting too.

Later I will read my "Ode to Made Up Characters" before we move onto the Middle Earth Saga Awards. But now, I will read the FFA for Best Actor in BOFA. This year, bizarrely one of the best parts of the film was the acting. The characters were finally given moments of real drama where people were actually DYING and not made of rubber. Personally, I thought all the nominees Tin picked were deserving (I think she thought so too) so neither of us voted here {{{{{{I actually voted for Martin because I thought he was amazing in "Love Actually"....that and it's my favorite movie so....}}}}}}}}}}} but regardless of whether or not we had voted, a front runner was already there from the start.

The nominees were:
Richard Armitage
Martin Freeman
Lee Pace
Luke Evans
Ken Stott
Graham McTavish

and the FFA for BEST ACTING (REGARDLESS OF CHARACTER) goes to:


I'd say that his character and the acting behind it were both pretty on par with what Tolkien intended.

The glue that held the crap together! He was the best thing in it in my view

"Also not surprising, seeing as this was the dumbest thing I've ever seen"

Great stuff so far, Tin

Next up! Two categories that are so opinionated that there are some nominees in both categories. For some reason, you all thought it would be a good idea to give PJ the benefit of the doubt and try to find a good invented action sequence. To be honest, the winner wasn't really even invented, but oh well!

The FFA for BEST INVENTED ACTION SEQUENCE goes to:


Now if we're honest, this is not really invented apart from Bard using his son to launch the black arrow, which actually in terms of creatively adding onto a character works. This is what adaptations SHOULD do.

But of course, the good only lasts for a few minutes before it all goes south. And I'd say it's so south that it's safe to call it Hellish territory.

The FFA for Worst Invented Action Sequence goes to:

THORIN vs. AZOG

This moment was destined for failure ever since Azog was a thought bubble in PJ's mind. It was known that this moment would come, that cliched final showdown that was pure invention. Dumb and demeaning, especially that bit with Azog floating down stream and THORIN STANDS AND WATCHES! I mean I did some pretty stupid things in my time, hell I lost a hand because of it, but even I know better than to expect them not to lunge. Villains ALWAYS lunge.

Tin will be back with the final award, I have to go rehearse my speech for later!

Thorin vs Azog was the most painful scene to watch of the entire trilogy, I think. Legolas vs Bolg almost came close enough to tie, but Azog the Immortal was just.. 

 hurrah its been a great award ceremony so far. I am glad Balin won best actor, he was the best thing in the films imo. I got worst cgi Galadriel too! yeah that was the pits. I cant remember what I put for worst made up action sequence, maybe I put all of them. anyway thanks your majesty, its great stuff.

Balin was able to take lines that Tolkien would never have written and make them sing. Too bad none of the dwarves in the original (except Thorin) were ever given any truly memorable lines.

And now for the final award of the BOFA section.

It's true that these three middle earth movies are called "adaptations" and the nominees in this category are the reasons why. However, I must admit making this category seemed at first a good idea, which then proved to be extremely difficult because possible nominees were quite elusive. Therefore I apologize for the blandness of the nominees, but an overall winner was had, and I have to admit that this part of the film was one I was most looking forward to and was not very disappointed by.

The FFA for BEST PART ADAPTED goes to:




My favorite scene by far! And yours too apparently!

The rest of the awards will continue after another short break! Stay tuned for Beren's Ode to Made Up Characters and the most prestigious award of them all: Best Middle Earth Movie (prestige may not really be what's at stake here, but oh well!)

 I voted for that scene too! It had Bilbo in it, so that swung it for me.

just looking at that scene again, in English for the first time, it struck me how false it looks and sounds. the set (the mountain) is obviously made out of plastic, those rocks aren't real rock, the way the water meets the rock is weird, the way Martin Freeman looks like he is just kneeling down in front of them, I get no sense he is smaller than them, his voice is wrong, too 'big' and deep, its absolute rubbish. Gandalfs tired 'told you so' twinkle, the yawningly boring hauteur of Thandypants, bloody hell its amateur. At one point Martins face even looks plastic.

Break Over! I was just watching some clips from BOFA after posting the last one and I physically cringed multiple times (that included kicking my desk by accident and pulling my hair. It's just so shitty looking!). I was in good spirits about BOFA until rewatching parts of it.

Good thing we're moving on then!!!! Beren will be up to announce Best Hobbit Movie in a few!

And while you wait, treat yourself to a fine bottle of Rasberry Buckie! The best in all of Forumshire, now just 500 calories! For a limited time, you can purchase 2 for the price of 3 minus 1!!! GREAT BARGAIN!!!!! See Petty for a bottle since he's currently hiding behind them from Huan!

I'm not hiding! I'm, um, guarding the buckie for you your Maj, in the safest place I know where- my stomach
Though if you could call Huan off that would be appreciated, iI dont like how he is drolling, and growling, and has that gleam in his eye like he is about to chase me up a tree....

Thanks my dear, I've been working on this poem for months! I got Daeron to help me! I'm so glad that we've become such close friends!

Ok, here its:

Ode of Made Up Characters

Dear Tauriel, Dear Alrid,
Dear Legolas and Azog
Dear Sauron and Radagast
and Dear White Council,
You were never part of the story
Well you kind of were, some of you
But the first four weren't!
And You could have been great!
Tauriel, you could have been fierce and loving
Caring about what happens to your wrongfully accused prisoners
instead of an adventurer until he got an arrow in the knee
Alfrid! You could have been... um... well...
You could have been Drogo Baggins! I'd have preferred
that.
Legolas, you are too old now. I am sorry.
Azog get out of here you don't even go here anymore you are dead.
Sauron you look like something not nice or polite to talk about
Radagast, or Radaghast, I'm not sure what's the actual spelling
I get being a friend to all beasts.
Believe me, I really do.
But I would NEVER let them poop on my face. NEVER.

White Council, you guys were doing well... until Dol Guldur.
Galadriel, Melian told you to stop smoking mushrooms,
clearly you haven't listened.

And who is this Strider guy? Aragorn's older brother?
Or have things changed since my time and 10 year olds can become
rangers of the Dunedain? Heck in my day if you were ten years old you'd
be shipped off to live with the elves.
Wait, didn't that actually happen?
So All you characters, you were added to bloat the story
And bloat it you did. You stole the show and not in a good way

Huan is coming for you.

The End.

Sweet Eru what was that? You said Daeron helped you? Daeron is about as helpful as a pile of troll dung, darling. He hates you. Why you haven't realized that yet is bizarre.

Anyway! First Award, and least prestigious:


This one is kind of hard to pick because it's just really based off of which one made you cringe the least. The winner isn't really surprising to me, though I have to say it's not my favorite. Oh well! This is a democratic process (sadly) so the winner of the FFA is:


Perhaps the film that stuck most closely with canonical material and the tone of the source material as well, I'm not surprised it won here in Forumshire. That being said, it was also the film that set our extremely low expectations.

I'm on break at work so I can't really join in but I just wanted to say that the show so far has been great! Bravo, Tin!

I was just snooping around {{{{{{{{{{{{searching for that drunkard Petty}}}}}}} and I stumbled across last year's awards thread. Beren was a brainwashed liberal back then! I'm happy to see he's changed his ways a little bit... We've rubbed off on him sufficiently! Rubbing Tin's buckie cellars with her old hair brush really worked!

This next award should be held in high honor. Regardless of how well the movies did in the box office or how good the movies actually were or how close they stuck to the book, making six movies was a cinematic feat. Sure Star Wars did it, but I'd have to say that Star Wars sucks and I HATE GEORGE LUCAS THAT SMUG BAST--


Sorry. When you only get to talk three times a year it's hard not to say everything at once.

Anyway, these movies were all pushing the envelope in cinematic production and technology, some of it paid off, some of it did not. But in the end, Peter Jackson has changed the way fantasy films were done, and we honor the hard work of everyone besides him who made these movies great or bearable, depending on the trilogy.

So without further ado, the BEST MIDDLE EARTH MOVIE FFA goes to:



Like AUJ, a movie that didn't know what kind of success it would have so it didn't try to be cute or overly intense but was concerned about telling a story and making sure it all worked together. A fine win, and another talking time used up.

WOOF.

Oh please, Huan! I still love these films! They're fantastic! I've just read the books now so I kind of get some of the, how do they say it around here, crabbit? Do I still think Peter Jackson is a cinematic genius, yes. Do I think he should make the Silmarillion? OF COURSE! But that's a discussion for another day. I'm excited for this category because it's super movie centric!!!

So this category was a write in (why Tin felt like she could trust you with such a great task is beyond me!) and you all actually delivered! A winner was found! Perhaps democracy and civility aren't foreign concepts to you after all!

First I'll list who was nominated by the people:
Ian McKellen
Hugo Weaving
Sean Bean
Sean Astin
Viggo Mortensen
Cate Blanchet

There was a tie here until Tin voted, and she had a tough time picking! But for BEST CASTING CHOICE ACROSS THE BOARD the FFA goes to:



He put his best into this role, even when I heard he was talking to tennis balls? Wow! That's some great acting! He was even better in LOTR. I forget that it's Sir Ian playing him and I think it's just Gandalf talking! Great choice you lot. In a close second were Sean Astin and Viggo, just an fyi.

There appears to be a bit of an issue... Tin has drunk all of the Rasberry Buckie she was selling. First of all, I thought that was impossible! She told me it was all Lemonade! There hasn't been any Buckie in Valinor for months! Of course she comes to Forumshire and gets absolutely plastered. Typical. Second, she has unknowingly contacted TORN and invited them to the awards. I think she thought it was Thingol... don't look at me I didn't tell her that's where I sent it! I definitely didn't send the invite to TORN! Stop it, get away from me-- are those eels??

Woof Woof ARROOOOOOOOOO

{{{{{{{{{{Sorry, I am NOT wasting my last chance to talk on Beren messing up again. Yes, Tin is drunk. Yes, TORN is coming, but I've called Weta Digital and they've sent 1,000 rubber dwarves to protect the borders of Forumshire. As we all know, CGI dwarves are indestructible. With that being said, and with the relative low activity on the forum right now, we'll return with the rest of the awards in the morning when everything has simmered down a bit. Also, I apologize for Beren's condescending comments. He's just an idiot. See you bright and early! (For us Valinorians at least).}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Hey Tin.... Argentina calling. Unfortunately adverse weather is interrupting our signal so we have not been able to tune in all night. We have been watching the highlights though and great show so far!! Look forward to the rest when this storm passes!

Popping on for a bit to say great job with the awards, Tin.

I'm surprised at the winner of worst action sequence. Legolas vs Bolg was atrocious.

Now that I'm reconsidering, I think I'd change my vote for best action scene to Smaug's death.

I hope that Beren and Huan will stick around after the awards are done. You lot are too much fun to have you stuck in Valinor most of the time. Thanks for an awesome awards show so far Tin. Fortunately I'm off work tomorrow so I'll be around so long as you don't start too early.

bungobaggins wrote:Now that I'm reconsidering, I think I'd change my vote for best action scene to Smaug's death.

The only two action scenes that made me feel anything other than bored were the barrel escape and Smaug's death. Since the former made me feel bemusement and the latter conveyed genuine emotion, it was a pretty easy vote for me.